I LOVE YOU

Yes , I still love you. Its hard just to let go after all those hard months I've been through. Yes, he BROKE my heart, stammered into pieces. Do I care ? Nahh , not at all.  Yes, i do feel the pain. It bleeds every time I see the flashbacks. Everyone keeps telling me to stop hurting my heart and take care of myself. FYI, I am taking care of myself. Its just, I can't helped myself when I missed him. WHY ? WHY ? WHY ? Why must I stay in this town ? Why can't I just move away , FAR away , to FORGET all this hurting pasts ? WHY. I always ask myself that question. 


He's right. I do get OVERACTED. Ohh , now I just want to forget things. Like what i wrote here.
Hoping he'll give me time to get over this. I started to be as quiet as possible. It is hard coz I already make him as my INSPIRATION , my HAPPINESS , my LEARNING SPIRIT. Yeah , he might NEVER have thought this in his mind , how he can be VERY SPECIAL to me. 


FYI my dearest, Kau adalah manusia yang baik. Aku tak pernah cakap kau jahat or kejam or yang sewaktu dengannya. You're not a LIAR either , you're just SCREWED. You need help, but you act like you're so strong ,facing all by yourself.  No matter , I'll take the blame you gave me. 


Sorry isn't enough right ? Well I don't think you ever give me some space to apologize to you. Chill my friend, I'll be gone after this year. 2011, tahun terakhir kau akan bertemu dengan aku. Aku harap jika kau ada masalah atau tidak puas hati dengan aku, aku nak settle dengan kau tahun ni, HARAPANlah kan ? Kau dah bagai bersumpah takmahu cakap dengan aku. 


Aku harap kau gembira, kau dah ada GF(Girl-friend or girlfriend) kan ? Haa , make sure dia happy kan kau. And heyy , it is okay and NORMAL lah kalau ada orang yang boleh baca kau. Takpayah gelabah sangat nak nafikan. HAHA.


Aku happy je kat sini. Aku happy sebab kau dah jujur. I waited long for this call , kau tahu ? Nvm lah , segalanya tentang aku amat tidak penting dan tak akan jadi penting untuk kau coz aku ni just a part from your dreadful past KAN ? 

Ohh ohh , IF we EVER meet again , please say HI. I mean , kita bukannya akan jumpa lagi EVERYDAY. The percentage untuk kita kerap berjumpa amat TIPIS , so takde hal lah kan .  This one favor I ask upon you , just say "HI" to me , the next time we meet (that might takes a few years later , HAHA) Dan aku juga rasa , favor ni isn't a big deal coz later on ,  kita akan GROW UP then , busy dengan university's assignments , then carrier and of course by that time kita akan lupa pasal hal ni , DAN kalau imbau kembali pun kita akan gelak and cakap , BODOHNYA aku masa tu. KAN ? KAN ? Tak percaya ? Takpe , wait and see. Aku rasa kau yang akan gelak terbahak-bahak and sampai aku rasa gelak kau sebijik macam ANNOYING ORANGE. rofl.

Kan senang kalau aku boleh bakar past aku macam bakar kertas ? 

Anyways , aku jadi FUSSY lepas kenal kau, fussy dalam relationships and ALL. Wow ? Besar gila effect kau kat aku kan ? Well , kau kan macam RAIN. Hujan yang sentiasa membasahi bumi dan menjadi faktor kesuburan bumi.(In other words, Rain is the factor of living beauty on earth) HAHA.

Rain ~~

Wahh , panjang lak entry aku masa pagi - pagi ni. Hmm ~ SPM. Arhhh , kacau daun. Haha,. I hope All's well Ends well.  Okaylah Mr ignorance. Daa~ Aku nak makan, taknak gastrik lagi. Sakitlahh. HEE !

OMAIGOD . Malu sekejap. HAHA

Okay , remember aku ada cakap nak DELETE blog ni? 


Well , pada saat aku nak delete tadi , aku hesitated. Entah kenapa . Amat kelakar . Serius.


Then , aku pergi balik . Ke tempat where ALL the truth is stored. Rasa pahit untuk ditelan.


Aku buntu , kelemahan aku memang pada "making decicions" . Well maybe sebab aku tak cukup dewasa. HAHA


Abaikan , yang penting sekarang ada someone precious bagi aku , seorang kawan , dia yang ubahkan decision aku harini . Thanks to her , BLOG ni selamat daripada diDELETE.


Oh btw , thanks yea kawan -kawan aku yang banyak membantu aku. Yelaa aku banyak menyusahkan korang. Bebal kan aku ni ? SOrry lah , aku ni baby lagi . =)


Harini aku happy sebab aku makan cokelat . COKELAT makes me happy !


Fyee -chan , thank you sebab kau ada masa aku hampir meletup tadi. =D


Hanaros -chan , thanks for encouraging me . XD


Ern ern thanks for your cuteness . HEE!

I love all of you .

비

I think .

The true facts . ( from the heart )
Will hurt me back . ( I hope not )
Now ? ( Please , I want to keep that smile )


Watching him , adoring quietly .

Zzzz . Apalah.

Okay , harini paper Agama Islam. Aku gelabah sikit sebab semalam aku tak baca lansung soalan -soalan or buku rujukan , Pagi-pagi baru nak mintak adik buku rujukan . =.=" Sengalnya. 


Paper 1 , banyak gila yang aku main taram. Harap -harap ada yang mengena. Dapat markah lulus pun sudah memadai memandangkan aku lansung TAK REVISE. So kalau hampir -hampir markah E tu padan muka lah kan ??


Paper 2 , Hmm susah jugak but alhamdulillah. Aku dapat jawab hampir semua ayat hafazan =) Cuma adalah soalan-soalan yang aku taram sebab tak sempat review or revise that particular chapters. 


Lepas sekolah, terus aku balik. Takde nak tunggu-tunggu or pandang-pandang dia lagi (Heh, aku nak fokus SPM) Masa dah sampai trafficlight Selayang baru aku sedar, BEKAL !! Aku tertinggal bekal kat bawah meja. Entah kenapa, aku sanggup buat U-turn dan hampir berlanggar dengan lori sayur =.= hanya untuk BEKAL tu je. Pelik kan ?


Berlari-lari menuju ke kelas aku. Fuhh , nasib baik budak sesi [etang tak guna kelas kiteorang. Dah amek bekal , terus balik. Taktau if ada mata yang pandang geligat aku yang berlari-lari tadi. Ngee , aku harap takde yang nampak kebodohan aku tadi. Lebih -lebih lagi si Ketam tu. ^^

......

Sekolah harini , bosan. Kecuali masa Kimia . Uuu ~ I love that teacher, XD

Today stayback , sementara menunggu Kah Yee. Memang tersangat bosan. =__________=

Asyik-asyik dia je yang aku tertatap , haishh boleh jadi aku siao ni ?

Bosan kat kantin , aku ke library. 3o minit berlalu , aku turun balik ke kantin. 

Aku nampak Shahira , then duduk dengan dia. Lama - lama , Achik lak sampai.

Borak lagi , menyakat lagi. Then , aku nampak Yunting. Aku tanya nampak Kah Yee tak?

Dia cakap Kah Yee cari aku kat library tadi. HUH? Aku bergegas ke library, takut dia lama menunggu aku pula. Dan study KIMIA bermula. Kah Yee pandai mengajar aku. Yes, aku dah mula faham sedikit sebanyak tentang chapter two. Thanks Kah Yee =D!

Then , aku teringat sesuatu. Ohh dia lagi. Kenapa ya ?

Tadi ke NSK , terjumpa Ana. Aku terkejut dan dia boleh cakap "Hai" dengan kasualnya. =_="

Waaaa , he attracts me all the way.

Okay , okay. Now, excitement all the way. He's cute. He's smart. Some people called him nerd and I just began to like him.

Another kitty comes to my life. He's cute. I've watched him ever since I saw him. Well, he's my taste. He's natural photogenic. And yes, he is kinda shy. The way he played in sports, i seemed to be mesmerized by his moves and his spirits.

What's more, he's good in literature. I love his words. His creativity, amazed me. I showed my friends a picture of him and asked them about him , they LIKED him as well. Whoa ?

However, if you dared to ask my sister. She'll reject him at first glance. She know who's best for me than anyone in this world. Btw, she's kinda fussy when it comes to my soul mate.

No matter how many cute kitties comes into my life. that one cat-face kitty boy always be the number 1 on the list. Don't know why, but it seems hard to me to live and forget just like that.

p/s : I still in love with him. And I keep on falling in love everyday =)